I think you are being completely reasonable. Like the others mentioned check with another dealer, it seems that you trade equipment often enough that they would want to honor their deal to keep you happy.

 
How easy is it to set that grapple off of the bucket? One man job or two to get it back on? The 1 thing that WD is really behind on is the grapple mounting, it just plain isn't handy. The one from Sheyenne Tooling looks really nice, probably pricey though. Might be better to just get another bucket.

http://www.sheyennemfg.com/index.php?p=grap

By the way the following, "Instead, I couldn't even park my loader for the 3-months it was riding around during haying. When I tried taking it off with the bale spear as per his recommendation, the loader slouched over, twisted the hood guard, and broke a hydraulic line" had me laughing hard enough to almost fall out of my chair