|
Southwestern Minnesota | Good for you to recognize this and be proactive. What starts out as small things can escalate and then it becomes increasingly difficult to work with.
One thing that's been mentioned previously is identifying her "love language". What does she want? Help? Small gifts? Your time? Find out what she wants and what makes her feel appreciated and then that's the key. For some, it's gifts. For others it might be acts of service- helping give the kids a bath, helping wash the dishes, picking up the toys, washing her car, filling on a tank of gas, etc. Maybe she wants some time alone with just you and a night out once in a while. Reading that book on the Five Love Languages can help you better determine what it is that will help her (and you) feel appreciated.
Another red flag is your comment about the "money" and being the breadwinner. When a couple doesn't match up on how they value money, it can be hard. The big things to match up on- money, religion, family, etc can be issues if you're not on the same (or close) wavelength. If you're a saver and this is really important to you and she is impulsive and that is really important to her, getting some advice/counseling (or at least an honest discussion between the two of you) can get this addressed before it becomes a major problem. If you see yourself as the breadwinner and she is the housewife, that could be a problem.
Lastly, I attended a church study group where we were discussing the differences in how men and women see things. It stuck with me that a Bible passage notes that men want to be respected and women want to be loved. So, you want her to respect your hard work, your providing for your family, etc. She wants you to love her. If you can both find ways to do that, I think that will go a long way to creating a relationship that can last.
My two cents from the woman's perspective. | |
|
Housewives - showing appreciation
